So, as anyone who has managed to stay following this blog over the years knows, I no longer post all that often. Once a year is a pretty big deal at this point. Part of that is because I’m well past the point in my life where I think about being trans very often. I’m heading toward fifteen years on, I can’t remember the last time I went to a trans group, being trans is kind of just background noise. It’s relevant, yes, but it’s not a focal point.
The other part is that I’m not entirely sure what to post. Trans blogs and the trans (and queer, really) community in general are heavily coming out focused. There’s not a whole lot out there for what to do once you’re already out. That’s partially for the same reason I no longer post much, the longer you’re out the less it tends to matter, but I think it’s also a little because no one knows what to say. It’s easy to give binder recommendations or talk about starting T. Everyone’s excited about that first shot, everyone’s nervous about coming out. These are topics we’re all comfortable and familiar with. It’s harder to talk about never quite getting past dysphoria or being frustrated about having been on T for years without fully passing (yeah, that’s me, I’m unlucky). Those things are depressing, but they’re also somehow things we don’t consciously think of. Probably in part because of how depressing they are.
I think there is a need for a “what now?” side of the community though. In particular for those of us with crap genetics who are still trying to deal with passing issues several years on. In recent years I’ve started looking at being trans a lot like how I look at my depression: something that isn’t going away and that I therefore need to learn how to live with long term. Ideally with healthy coping mechanisms rather than being cranky all the time.
Issue is, I still don’t know what to post. I know I want to put together a post on how I’ve learnt to deal with dysphoria/not passing long term, but other than that I’ve got nothing. So if anyone is actually still reading this and has something I’ve not covered (or that might need to be covered again given how much has changed since I came out), drop a comment. I can’t guarantee I’ll get to it quickly, I’m currently back in school and taking an insane course load, but with summer coming up I’ll have some free time.