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I actually have lots of feminist friends and would consider myself a feminist (though of course the word means many different things these days and covers a huge range of political standpoints). Most of the feminists I know are very much for improving things on all sides and recognise the damaging effects of patriachy on people of all genders. Though I guess I’ve just been lucky that I’ve mostly avoided the crazies.

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The homophobic gay man thing is fairly new. I don’t like HRC and Neil Patrick Harris annoys me so I must be homophobic. Really I just don’t like people trying to force me to conform to some asexual, heterocentric ideal when I’m a poly queer who *likes* Pride and drag queens and OMG!Sex. It’s kind of funny when you think about it.

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But yeah if one group gets to have “specialized support” they ALL should, I think. But then, I kinda find affirmative action to be a bit insulting (like, oooh I’m a woman that automatically means I had it harder and need help – nevermind I scored above all the boys in EVERYTHING in school), so I’m a bit odd.

I have… never heard of anybody getting the “homophobic gay man” label before. O.o Wowwwwwww. I daresay that’s worse than antifemale female. Gotta love that loud crazy subset of the world, eh? Just wish they’d shush long enough for people to realize they are not, in fact, wholly representative of what they claim to represent… they have a lovely habit of hurting their own causes. Like PETA but with human rights…

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Heh. I got the “omg you’re a sexist woman!” crap before I came out. Now I get the “homophobic gay man” and “transphobic trans man” stuff instead. Funny how disagreeing with militants automatically makes you a bigot.

I kind of expected that most of the comments would be from guys. Not many women have need to stumble on a blog for gay trans guys

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I hate how this whole paedophile obsession has cropped up. My dad used to be an honorary girl scout so he could help chaperone out trips. Nobody thought anything of it at the time. Now I suppose they’d be all creeped out or something. Nevermind that he was our fierce protector if anybody actually *did* look at us that way.

But you’ve hit on some of the points here that often get ignored in articles like this. It’s funny to me, among other things, how “girl’s night out” is expected to be granted now, yet in movies and tv we see “guy’s night out” as something perfectly acceptable to be forbidden by some catty wife, because of course when guys get together all they do is drink and complain about their wives and scope for other hot women, right? Couldn’t possibly be that they just want to hang out with their friends.

I made some comments like this on a forum/blog/something of that nature years ago (also including that if somebody WANTS to be a housewife – my mother did – then they shouldn’t be looked down on for that) and actually got told that I’m a sexist (against women). I tried to correct them by saying I AM a woman and have nothing against women’s rights, just don’t think that should mean men get trampled in the process. Well gee, I learned that day that apparently I CAN be sexist against my own gender and I am a horrid awful insult to women. Well alrighty then.

I actually find it a little annoying that you can’t have any male-only schools, since there are still women-only schools and, well, any struggles I had in life had NOTHING to do with me being female. We don’t have those same roadblocks anymore unless we create them for ourselves (I’m not talking about the occasional jerk you get – even men have to deal with those, my boyfriend has been sexually harassed in the past even though I NEVER have). But I do think there would be some benefit to that ability to fraternize. Because of the different pressures society puts on different genders, there are some attentions boys need that girls may not. Now, if their parents were like mine and didn’t try to pigeonhole they may not need it so much, but not everybody grew up with parents like mine. Just the way it goes.

I’m sort of rambling on here. But since it seemed most of the comments were from other men I figured I’d toss a woman’s support your way too.

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A lot of people suffer domestic violence. Most are women, but that is not reason to ignore a victim because he happens to be male. If you are against violence you are against all violence.

I am in the UK and the BBC aired the first episode of a new police drama last night (another reworking of the two mismatched detectives working together formula). It got pretty good reviews. At the end one of the cops, suspecting their spouse of infidelity – wrongly, as it turned out – broke both kneecaps of their decent honest spouse. The show got good reviews and the domestic abuse was considered funny.

You’ve guessed it. The violent cop was female and she broke her husband’s bones and this was generally considered funny.

Just imagine it the other way around. Imagine even pitching a script…

“And after they’ve solved the crime there’s this really funny bit where the cop breaks his wife’s kneecaps with a large piece of wood! He does it quite deliberately, and he does one, then the other so it takes longer on screen, and – here’s the really funny bit – it turns out she wasn’t being unfaithful after all! Hysterical! Oh, and don’t worry, the wife is so loving (fearful?) she doesn’t press charges and the cop doesn’t even get disciplined. Really funny eh?”

Would anyone even think of making a show like that? No, but it seems, in the UK anyway, women breaking men’s bones is funny, in fact to be admired, because the character is the star of the show.

Surely we should be against all domestic violence?

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